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final day of creative entrepreneurship retreat; click for day 1, day 2, day 3, and day 4)
Today was the last day of the retreat, and a rather dark day emotionally. Felt kind of wrathful, insecure, etc. So I explored it. This is what “no confidence” looks like.
Then I looked at it through imagery. Shame, guilt, judgement, anger. The dark side emerges.
Felt marginally better after the release.
And a poem to cheer me up.
OK, so there is so much to say, but I need to let everything sink in for a day or two, then I’ll do a reflection post about the week.
Thanks to those who have been following this creative process and giving encouragement!
emergent by design 
Hi Venessa I imagine you’re still well deep in feeling, I hesitate to intrude I love that you are giving those voices space, listening by feeling… to share in my experience (I believe you know) it is what is unacknowledged, the unconscious that can bite me in the bum, whatever I repress, judge, reject, deny can be good qualities or seeming negative and often as not I project it onto others. So I see you are taking them (the shadow self) on the journey it looks to me like you honor them/you/us, and can own them (I usually know when I feel remorse! Eeew I thought it was ‘them’ you know that ‘other’ and now I realise I do that myself-oops they are myself!) we wont give you too much bother!
Venessa,
you not yet realize your importance, you only begun to discover your power… h….h….h
…..Venessa….h….h….”I am your father….
I had a vision of a mask once
In a dream when I was 17
The most horrible thing I’ve ever seen
Like a Gorgon of a modern kind
Much less simple, much less refined
I felt as though I’d lost all sense time
Staring into this alien kind
Of horrible, scornful, pestilent slime
But at 23 I realized my enemy was my mind
Our friend Seth apparently just wrote this for you/me/us.
More…
Venessa, Thanks for posting these powerful artifacts of your journey. The raw energy conveyed by your honest words and images has a renewing and creative force. They crack open the status quo, letting new possibilities shine. Traveling into the messy, unresolved and dark territory of our psyches is where we rediscover our true light. Sharing what we find there renews us and the world. Thanks again for having the courage to travel into your unknown and bring back the gold of self-discovery.
My friend,
You have my deep gratitude for sharing this lovely experience with us.
Your courage is my encouragement. 🙂
You know heroes are crazy right? Welcome to the club. Dying is hard, but you get used to it. :-p
Oh, by the way, I added you as my peer on my project site. http://g-a-i-a.org/team/advisers
Your role is to be and do what you are already doing. Don’t change a thing OR change everything, I’ll let you decide. 😀
Thank you.
somethings (feelings) are to be witnessed as they move through, pass by.
love that poem.
and thank you, thank YOU for sharing.
xo. a
Loved the poem.
Pure poetry. Thank you.
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